How to Stop my Wife from Nagging

 

The Problem...

Your wife nags you all the time!

 

So you... 

Told her "stop being such a nag!"

and now...

 Silence with the sound of slamming cupboard doors and an unexplainable aftertaste in your dinner.

 

take it like a man...

 

If you act like a child you will be treated like a child. What defines acting like a child?

1. Leaving a trail of bodily fluids wherever you go.
2. The manners of a disgruntled fast food employee.
3. An inability to recognize the work that goes into clean floors.
4. An over abundance of toys you don't even play with.
5. The personal hygiene of a South American Gorilla Hostage.

Now Fix It!

Recognize the signs of a wife with an empty love tank. When a wife begins to feel unloved and un-adored her nagging radar begins to rise. It's like a self preservation tactic. On a really bad nagging day ask yourself if there are any unresolved issues you need to address, or apologise for. Take her on a date, show her some love give your poor big girl bossy pants a hug!

Overworked and underpaid. If you still live in the 18 century then you will carry the belief that house work and child rearing is a woman's job. If that is still the case then you need not continue reading and check yourself into the 21st . BUT if you are empathetic and involved like most men are today (sexy!) Then you should easily recognize that women respond to feeling overwhelmed and overworked verbally (... nagging)

So help take the load off her. Hire someone to help around the house, even if it's just to clean bathrooms or floors. Take on a few more regular chores and get the kids involved.

 Pay Her! Slip a bit of dough in her skirt on a Saturday morning and say ... "this is for all your hard work you do to keep our house together, so go buy yourself something nice for the date I'm taking you on tonight...."  

Please DON'T initiate sex at this moment or you just bought yourself another silent treatment sentence. After a day at the mall with your credit card and a date at the end;  you my man have just bought yourself a sure thing! Your Wlecome

With all the responsibilities of your job (which you better have, unless you're at home being the caregiver and hero to your kids or are an injured sexy air force pilot.) it's easy to come home and just check out. When you've had a hell of a week it's easy to forget what your wife asked you to help her with or fix or clean.  Don't be so prideful to ask for a list. aka (honey do list). Women LOVE checklists  it's like crack to a control freak. Nothing turns a woman on more than a checked off completed to-do list; especially if it's been completed and checked off by YOU!

What God says about nagging...

•  It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a nagging wife.
• A continual dripping on a rainy day and a nagging wife are alike;
• It is better to live in a desert land than with a nagging and fretful woman.
• A foolish son is ruin to his father, and a wife's nagging is a continual dripping of rain.



How to motivate your wife to lose weight

The Problem...

Your wife is flabby, frazzled and frumpy.

So you... 

Bought her a treadmill for her birthday.

and now...

 silence with a hint of muffled tears and chocolate wrappers.

take it like a man...

BAM! If you have been somewhat responsible in getting your wife pregnant with one or more children then you are partly, no wait, mostly to blame. If you were a war veteran and came back from battle with one leg and your wife constantly nagged you about it, your medal of honor would be of less significance. Our deflated bellies and stretch marks are a part of the wounds of battle. God designed our bodies to carry life so that you could have someone to fetch you things and scratch your back. So please never nag a wife about the changes that she can't do anything about. 

 Ouch!  Being physically attracted to her hubby is just as important to a woman. Guy flab is not so sexy.  Remember the cologne, ironed shirts, clean shaving, and muscular arms you used to fling around her shoulders at the movies? These were all part of the package in choosing you too. So make sure you are making an effort to be all that for her. 

now fix it!

 Turn fitness into fun and romance for her. Take your wife dancing, ice skating, moonlit walks or to some other fun "calorie burning activities." This will not only make your wife swoon over all these fantastic dates you've been planning but also bring you closer together and burn calories for both of you. p.s please don't tell her your doing it for exercise. Don't be dumb.

Woo her. When your wife married you she probably ate very little and worked out every day just for you. Life was simple then, you were everything to her and you let her know it too! Remember those days? When a woman is feeling overwhelmed, empty in spirit, and unloved she hits the pantry. nuf said. It's in our nature to do so. We will gravitate to whatever or whomever is sweet, rich and satisfying.

Be sensitive to her deepest insecurity.  Most men's self worth generally radiates from their achievements. A woman's self worth is very tangled up in her appearance.  It may sting a little to receive an insult on the big ole' bouncing beer belly but defiantly not as devastating as your wife telling you, you're useless.and lazy. Am I right? Making rude comments or jokes about your wife's weight is really really devastating and not a motivator at all.Stop looking at other women. When your wife catches your glances elsewhere her self esteem plummets. Hello pantry! When you are distorting your mind and hers with unrealistic images of photo-shopped women, you are placing unrealistic expectations on your wife. You are sending her a message that only "that will do" and usually "that" is so unrealistic she'll give up before she even starts. Go ahead and  google images of paintings of 1800  century women and see what a REAL woman looked like, before they had photo shop and implants! If your wife constantly swooned over wealthy men with smoking hot abs and a PHD, there is no way that 90% of you men could ever obtain that! So don't put that on your wife either.

Make a plan to change your approach.  I know that most men are well intentioned but just have a heck of a time understanding the emotional complexities of women! So here is an example of a one week plan to help motivate your wife to firm up and strut for you! (do not pressure for sex during this experiment or she'll think it's all for that, don't be dumb.)

Monday: Start off the week right, with a love letter for her to find. (use your own words please!)

Dear Wife:
I just wanted you to know, that I caught myself day dreaming of you the other day. I was thinking of how proud I am of having such a beautiful wife. I'm sorry if I've ever made you feel otherwise. I am still attracted to you after all these years. Thanks for being such an amazing woman!

Tuesday: Call your wife mid day, and tell her you're bringing dinner home. Make a healthy choice for the lot of you. (lots of grocers now have pre- roasted hot cooked whole chickens, grab that with a salad and frozen yogurt with fresh fruit for dessert. Do the dishes. After dinner ask her to go for a walk with you. Hold her hand and let her talk as you listen.

Wednesday: Tell your wife you'd like to sit down after the kids are in bed and plan out a dream holiday with her. Whether it's 6months - 3 years away. Make a plan along with your wife to take her away from it all. Nothing motivates a mommy more than taking her to a climate that  requires less clothing!

Thursday:  Send your wife a bouquet of flowers with a note. "Let's make a date for Friday night. You get the sitter,(extra points if you arrange that too!)  I'll take care of the rest! Oh and wear that black dress you look so hot in!"

Friday: Take her out dancing and/or for  sushi (low fat) dinner and then a walk in the park afterward. Tell her you would like to sign up together for dancing lessons or some other physical activity you'd both enjoy. Make a plan to commit to something. Do your homework for example : "such and such is offering golfing lesson every Saturday. I thought maybe Grandma could take the kids every Saturday and you and I could take golfing lessons together, what do you think?" (do not even mention it's for exercise!!!) Don't be dumb

Saturday: Guaranteed you've probably earned some wicked scores by now, and may have even received a score yourself. So now what? Seal the deal with $$$$. Give your wife a bit of doe to go buy herself something nice. When a women feels great in what she is wearing she's more motivated to slim down and hey, in the right fitting clothes you may begin to appreciate those sexy curves!

Sunday: Find her at her worst whether it's first thing in the morning, or late at night after a haggard day of kids. Sweats, ponytail, the breath of a dead badger, don't care just pull her close to you, dip her and in your best french accent. "You are so beautiful, I am so in love with you!"  I doubt Sleeping Beauty's breath was full of fairy tale after sleeping for a year. And the reason Rapunzel's hair was so long is because she was locked in a tower and couldn't get out for a haircut. But their prince still came for them. Is your wife locked up in a tower with children? Let her out for a haircut every once in a while.

I have just given you men a very valuable key to the motivation of a women.  Continue throughout the week, wooing, spending and adoring. And you'll see a motivated wife in all areas in no time! Guaranteed!

You're Welcome...